5 Things They Told You About Love Making Which Are Far from Reality!
How was your first love making experience – the answer to this question from most people would result in a rather disappointed or underwhelming ‘Hmm’ or a thought-killing ‘Well…’, and it would almost never end with a smile on their faces. This is because most of the people, while entering the bedroom for the first time with their partner, go with their own set of misconceptions. If you felt that way or are about to enter into that phase of your relationship, you must read this one.
Why is it so difficult to make great love with your partner? Isn’t it a pure science – touch here, go there, be fast or go slow? Well, not exactly. This holds true, because everyone has a unique body which responds to different stimulus in different ways and to a different degree. Some women may go bananas with a peck on the neck, others may lay down unresponsive to it. If these questions float in your head, we are here to help you out. Here are 7 misconceptions people have about love making, which are far from reality.
I know everything.
Okay, this is more of a ground rule for pretty much everything you do in life – if you think you know ‘everything’ about something even before you have experienced it for the very first time, please sit back and think again; most probably, you will see how badly you were misguiding yourself. You can only get perfect with time and that would start only when you start acknowledging that you don’t know all of it, sometimes, not even most of it.
There is nothing to be ashamed about here. Most of the sex education in the world is very arbitrary and does not even take you through the basics. Besides that, you have not yet explored your partner’s choices and dislikes. Your partner herself/himself is unaware of several ‘key points’. The beauty of this process is – once you set off with honesty, both you and your partner can discover more about each other. So go with an open mind, and be ready to learn.
Well, the people in those movies can do it; so can I.
Most people look at adult films and decide – well, that’s it? This is like telling yourself, “Since I could ace that video game, I can actually drive a car in real life even if I have never set my hands on a steering wheel.”
Adult movies, like all movies, are pieces of fiction and have performances, not genuine human experiences. The body parts, the situations and even the endings – are mostly fictitious and designed to amuse you. Reality, will not be the same most of the time.
The fact is that love making is much more sensational than shown in most of the adult movies. There can be a separate blog post about all the things that are wrong with adult movies, but for now, just note – if you haven’t experienced love making first hand, you probably don’t know much about it and hence, adult movies should not be your point of reference.
At the risk of sounding redundant, go in with an open mind.
Well, I can do it wherever and whenever I want it.
As much as we would like to believe we are still a part of the animal clan we evolved from – we are not. Over the centuries, we as humans have developed several social constructs which have become a part of our psyche and how our body reacts to things. While it the mile-high club may work for some people, it may not work for you and your partner. Besides, arousal is not a mode which you can switch on or off; it’s more of a phase in which you enter, enjoy and then exit. The more naturally you take it, the better it will be. Beyond that, just because you have seen or heard someone’s story of having made love in some unique place, it does not mean it will work for you as well.
Different people have different wavelengths of gauging emotions and reacting to the situations. Some people like the light, some people prefer the dark. If you are yet to understand what works for you, why not start with understanding – what works for your partner!
Lubricant – who needs that?
The shorter answer to that is – everyone. Yes, you read that right. It is not ludicrous of people to use it. Lubricants can ease the work as well as increase the pleasure for both you and your partner. You will never understand the utility of why you need it, up until you actually use it. Unlike the ‘advice’ you will receive from your ‘gang’, don’t use just about any liquid – oil, moisturizer or cream as a lubricant. After all, you will never put hair oil on your face to moisturize it, would you? Similarly, lubricants have a specific role which should be performed by the lubricants themselves.
We have a great chemistry in our relationship. Obviously our intimate relationship will be equally awesome.
While it’s true, that if you know your partner really well, you will have some idea about what she/he would like in the bedroom. This may give you some edge in pre-empting what your partner is looking for, but you should not completely bank on this.
People can be significantly different in the bedroom than how they are outside. This is not hypocrisy, it’s just how people are. Besides, what can be more beautiful than watching your partner let go of her/his inhibitions and guards? When all the veils, physical and psychological, are out of the equation, that’s when you can truly make love.
If you keep doing what you think your partner would love, you will end up building love making into a mundane process. There should always be space for spontaneity and exploration, and that would come in only if you are going beyond your preconceived notions of what your partner might like.
A key aspect of exploring with your partner, is trying out different hats – quite literally. Cosplay or just trying out new attires, can lead to entirely new experiences both you and your partner never imagined. Have a look at our collection at KamukLife.com and who knows, you might find the next amazing chapter in your love making story; one, you never saw coming!